I have been really enjoying everyone's lists. I have learned a great deal about everyone reading them and am happy to see so many others jumping in with their lists!
Today I realized that I made a budget mistake this month. Thankfully, it was in a good way. I get 3 paychecks in September and only budgeted for 2. The extra $$ will go towards debt repayment. (Yay!) I can handle a good mistake!!
The little guys went to children's advocacy today- and got to share their story and thoughts with protective services in a non-threatening environment. It sounds like the kids shared enough concerning memories, that they will be in protected custody for a long time to come. THANK GOODNESS. I am finally breathing a sigh of relief tonight.
I stopped by DD2s after work to deliver the clothes I got at Goodwill and that have been donated by coworkers and friends. It was fun to watch all the kiddos having fun. No craziness in their lives, just good old fashioned, hide n go seek kinda fun.
Archive for September, 2016
I have been really enjoying everyone's lists. I have learned a great deal about everyone reading them and am happy to see so many others jumping in with their lists!
Years ago, saving advice bloggers posted a list of unique facts about themselves, that helped fellow bloggers and lurkers(- not my word) get to know each other better. Since it's been so long, I thought maybe this would be something fun to do again.
Here is my list:
1. I am married, 26 years
2. I have 4 kids. 3 daughters, 1 son
3. I have 6 grandkids, 3 boys, 3 girls plus 3 foster grandkids, 2 boys, 1 girl
4. I work full time at a job I have been at over 20 years
5. I have blogged here for 10 years.
6. I am a huge Greenbay Packers fan.
7. I once bred labrador retreivers
8. I once lived in a haunted house
9. I wont eat wild game meat
10. I co-founded a financial fraud team that has grown statewide and has stopped many financial criminals.
11. I have only traveled to the US and Mexico.
12. My bucket list destinations include Mt. Rushmore and Easter Island
13. I am fascinated by ancient mysteries (like Stonehenge)
14. My all-time hero is John Wayne
15. I hope to retire in 2020
16. I love to bake.
17. My husband works in Alaska and I only see him about 50% of the year
18. I have lived in 13 houses during my life, and have owned 9 cars.
19. I have a published article and have been on TV 2 times
20. I have met 7 fellow SA bloggers. I hope to meet more!
So, I have offered 20 facts. How many can you share? Looking forward to see what you share!
ps. If you are a 'lurker' who hasnt started blogging yet, what's holding you back? I am SURE you have things to share with our group... JOIN US!! We would enjoy hearing from you!!!
I stopped by Goodwill tonight on my way home to look for fall clothes for J (foster baby, 16 mo). I was able to pick up 3 pairs of pants, 4 tops, 2 zip up sweaters and 2 pairs of warm jammies for $20. ALl of the clothes were good quality and in really good condition. Thank goodness for Goodwill!
While I was checking out, I was explaining what the clothes were for- the lady checking me out said "I have 9 grandkids and ALL of them are in foster care"...She said it was due to drugs and the epidemic we have. I was speechless. I wished her well and left feeling even more frustrated for children. WTH.
I want to try to find some age appropriate toys for both boys this weekend. I am starting with the power of Facebook, and will look for sales, yard sales, etc. we also have an avenue at work for placing classified ads. We have many younger parents who might have toys that have been outgrown. Past experience tells me that plastic containers, metal containers and wooden and plastic spoons will work for the baby. Blocks and pretend play for Z (age 5) and maybe a few books.
So, my mission this weekend is to scavenger hunt!
The final hurdle DD2 had to overcome was having her home certified for foster care. That means, background checks, references, fire extinguishers, fire alarms, kid locks, locked up cleaning supplies, no accessible fire arms or other hunting equipment, sufficient beds, no aggressive pets, and a tidy home. Her home was certified tonight! YAY.
Now, let's get back to routine life!
I have been trying to eat healthier the past few months. Cutting back on foods that arent good..and adding foods that are. Today, I went to the local co-op market and picked up some banana chips thinking that would make a healthy snack. Unfortunately, I looked it up when I got back to work and not so much. The coconut oil that is used is not as healthy as it sounds....so back to the drawing board.
Earlier this year, I inherited a black lab from my former brother in law who passed away. His name is Shotgun (cause he rode shotgun in the truck with BIL)...Tonight I learned that Shotgun wants to carry the mail home from the mail box. I had no idea. He walked down with me, and when I pulled out the mail, he grinned and opened his mouth and took the mail from my hand...then proceeded to walk (prance) home with it and gave it back once we were in the house. OMG. It was so cute. I knew he would go get the paper for my BIL, but we dont get a paper here...apparently, he would get the mail too! What a sweet surprise.
Today was the court date.
As it turned out, our case was last on the morning docket- meaning there were 4 other cases heard before ours.
Child after child being placed in foster care because of unhealthy home environments. Drugs and neglect in each situation...a brand new nursing baby removed from its 18 year old mother, a 13 year old crying as she was told she was removed from her home- a home with drugs and 9 dogs, a child that neither parent bothered to show for court. Just gut wrenching case after case.
When our case came, it wasnt much different. In the end, 2 more kids put in foster care another child transferred to the other parent, a very upset mother and a sense of relief that the kids will be safe for a while. The sister will go to dad, the boys were placed with DD2. (Yay!)
Z is back, along with his baby brother, in DD2s care...after 22 months away. It quickly became very apparent that BM and her mom will not be making this easy and intend to fight the placement vehemently. Foster parents sometimes need a thick skin when they step in to help. Hurtful words, threats, accusations. It got ugly. Sigh.
But on a much happier note, Z was so excited about his first day at school. He had major anxiety this morning about being left by DD2, but the teacher, who knows his situation, took extra care to make his day special.
The next court date is October 27- barring any surprises, the placement should hold until then, and beyond. DD2 was present at the hearing and the judge made a special point in thanking her for her contributions.
While I am extremely happy with the judges decision, I worry what it will do to Z if/when he is pulled again from DD2's care. He is extremely attached to her.
Time will tell. For today, lil Z and baby brother J, welcome home!
Today was thankfully low key compared to the past couple of days. We go to court tomorrow to find out what will happen with the kids in the short term. Right now there are a lot of emotions from all sides and it will be nice to get a plan in place so that everyone understands at least the legal expectations. I just hope there isnt near term turmoil for the little guys. Z starts kindergarten in the morning, so DD2 plans to make the morning special for him before heading off to court.
I spent today home with a sore throat. No bueno. At least it wasnt a work day and I was able to relax. Hopefully I will wake up all better, and ready for the busy week ahead! I can't afford to get sick right now. We have PTO at work, which means one pot for all sick and vacation time to pull from. I keep at least 40 hours on the books for an emergency, but otherwise, I use my time off. Right now, I my time off is scheduled through next May, so I am hesitant to dip into that emergency 40, unless absolutely necessary!
I ate leftovers today, and so it was a no spend day. Likely tomorrow I will go to lunch after court with DD1, who plans to go with me. Dd2 has to attend via phone since she took 2 days off last week to get the kids situated, registered, etc.
Again, thank you for all the kind wishes regarding the kids. I appreciate all of the support for them.
Last night and today were traumatic on everyone.
BM and BF were arrested late last night on outstanding warrants. DHS put all three kids in emergency placement in DD2s home.
Today BM/BF were released, but could not contact each other or DD2/kids. (who knows if they are together today or not)
DD2 spent the day making arrangements for daycare,buying diapers, and taking care of the baby who was very fussy.
Backing up a bit....Yesterday BM and BF ran out of gas. It was 100 out. BF and baby stayed with car, while BM hitchhiked to DD2s job to borrow $5. Later that night the baby was dropped of with the other kids at DD2s house. Much later, DD2 recevied the call about the arrest.
Today, the baby woke in considerable distress. An ER visit later to learn he was dehydrated from yesterday's stint in the heat.. and had to receive IV fluids. He is only 18 months old. Apparently they ran out of food and water while waiting in the hot car for BM to return and then did not hydrate him sufficiently.
Monday is court to determine placement for the kids. The father of the eldest girl wants her. So she will likely be placed with him. The boys have no family that will want them. Both of their dads are either in jail or currently homeless and in and out of jail. Extended family is not interested. So likely, they will stay with DD2 indefinitely.
Which means, here we are again. BM and her mother are angry that the kids are placed in foster care. DD2 is doing what she can to create a safe and stable home for the boys.
SMH at this turn of events. I guess we will learn more on Monday what the future holds for the kids.
I was reviewing my 401k records today and was happy to see that my account has grown almost 50k in the past year! Hopefully it will continue on this trajectory until 2020, when I plan to retire. If so, I will have met my savings goals while also paid off my debt goals and will comfortably achieved retirement goals.
I finally turned in that bag of pennies today. $21.43. It is one less thing to worry about as we declutter. I set the money aside to determine what to do with it..
I ended up leaving work early today to pick up Z and bring him home for the afternoon. He was so cute. He honestly is one of the gentlest souls I have ever met. We spent the afternoon giggling and blowing bubbles. Then met up with the rest of the family for birthday dinners. TOnight he is staying with DD1s family- visiting his other cousins.
I am ready for the weekend. Tomorrow night I am having DD1's kids over for the night. DD1 and hubby are DJing a wedding-
Otherwise,not much to report. Very concerned for Julie, aka Ima Saver. It has been quite a while since she has posted- and she had medical issues the last time she did post. I sure hope she is ok.
Does anyone know if Julie is ok? I noticed she has been ill and hasnt posted in several weeks...Not sure if anyone kept in touch with her outside of SA???
I am working on getting my frugal rhythm back this week. When the hub is home, we spend more than I do when I am home alone. So far so good. I am using up the last of my chili that I made last weekend, minus the 10 chili bean burritos that are still in the freezer. Those are still waiting for a later date.
I always have free coffee at work, rather than buying coffee on the way to. I used to spend about $3.50-4 a day, everyday...but about a year ago, I stopped. Now I prefer regular coffee over foo-foo coffee. I have even broke myself from needing creamer and just use a little sweetener.
Ive been taking lunches and trying not to spend. I did have to get gas today.
Tomorrow will be a spender though. It is DD2 and my granddaughters birthday, so I will be taking them out to dinner tomorrow night.
I am starting to plan Christmas gifts and love that I can use verizon points to give magazine subscriptions as an option. Rachel Ray, Oprah, womens magazines, teen magazines...I will see how well I can utilize those options!
Football starts tonight! I am so excited that it is once again football season. I love making soup and watching the games. I am a HUGE Packers fan. Any other Packers fans here? If not, WHO is YOUR team???
I still havent turned in the pennies. I have been pretty busy at work...but...tomorrow, I plan to bite the bullet and get it done.
Z had an awesome day with DD2...and sis made it to her first day of school. The plan is that all 3 kids will stay with DD2 again tonight. Another day for the kids to feel safe and secure. BM and BF did sleep in their car last night. They were hoping welfare would come through today so that they could get a hotel room tonight. FOr the unborn baby's sake, I hope they were successful.
Z and his sis were dropped off at DD2s job about midday today- DD2 then brought them by my job - which was such a joy! They have both grown SO much. After work, I met them at the mall so that we could get sis a new dress for school tomorrow.
Out of the mouths of babes, they talked about bits and pieces of their lives- and it was so sad- primarily to hear a 7 and 5 year old know some of the things they do. (They were sad they had to leave there toys and clothes and pets behind, "but mommy and BF were in trouble and they left during the night" and "their house was trashed with all their stuff, and cat poop" etc.) It is clear there is no filter when they are around the adults, drugs, and fighting at home. I pray the school and DHS will sort through this and help protect them.
But HOORAY...they are back for today and it was amazing to hug those sweet kiddos.
Unfortunately, BM and her bf had no place to stay tonight, so they came to the mall and picked up sis so that they had a reason to drop in on sis's aunt and see if she would let them stay there tonight. With tomorrow being her first day of school, sis was excited...so I hope BM follows through and gets her there.
Tomorrow is DD2s birthday, what a great birthday present this is for her!!!
Thanks for letting me share my Z story. I am such a happy gramma tonight!
Update: BM dropped sis and the baby off with DD2. All three will be safe tonight! Didnt expect her to leave the baby too, but DD2 welcomed all three with opened arms.
I looked up the depression glass pattern of the set that my mom had- it is called Old Colony- and its pink. The set is beautiful, but very fragile. At least now I know what it is as I determine what to do with it. Letting the dishes sit in a box will just allow them to deteriorate. I know there is someone who would appreciate them and I could put any $ from a sale towards college funds for the grandkids. I say this like I have decided, but the truth is, just thinking about selling the dishes makes me sad.
I think I will tuck my dad's coin collection away. Coins wont lose value- and maybe someday a grandchild will appreciate receiving a coin from their great grandfather.
The rest of the things, I just need to donate. It's time.
So, Z still isnt here. Supposedly BM is actually on the road today and plans to arrive at midnight. The plan tonight is that she will drop Z and his sis off at DD2s when they get to town, and DD2 will take them to school in the morning. Until it actually happens, we dont know for sure. DD2 spoke to the principal at the school today, and the principal has an appt with DHS tomorrow to start a case.
Today was a no spend day. I packed my lunch and then as I was leaving work, a co-worker offered my here pasta salad from lunch that she didn't/wont eat. (It has too much garlic for her taste) Since it was destined for the trash, I took it. Super yummy!
I found a dollar in the bottom of my computer bag tonight, so it is going into the tip bag for the cruise we are taking in November. So far I have saved $72 towards tips by turning in loose change and saving my small bills.
In our quest to declutter and downsize, we are finally starting to go through all of my parents things. Its been almost 8 years since my dad passed, and 6 since my mom. My mom had a full set of depression glass, my dad a small collection of silver coins. What to do...
My mom's depression glass is carefully packed away- in several boxes. Very beautiful, very fragile, but not something me or my girls have space for, nor do my girls want it. My dads coin collection, probably less than $500 is in a box, not taking up much space....but again- not something anyone really wants.
What do I do with keepsakes like this? Each year, my dad kept a journal..those are a no-brainer...I will keep, no question. But when it comes to things they collected, what to do?
They are heartbreaking to part with, but then just taking up space to keep. Suggestions? Do I keep for grandkids...do I sell....
Happy Labor Day friends!
We are certainly starting to feel fall in the air here in So Oregon! The mornings and evenings are chilly- weather has dropped during the day to well under triple digits. I cant wait for the leaves to start turning. Fall really is my favorite time of the year!
The word on the street is that BM (and BF and kids) are on the way here today from Washington. Also, that BM is already using again (and pregnant). She hasn't told DD2 if the kids will be allowed to stay with her or not. They start school tomorrow. Her plan is still living in the mission. Sigh.
I am going to enjoy this beautiful Labor Day at home. While the hub is in Alaska, I am trying to stay frugal- something that isn't as easy when he is home. Lately, it feels like we are on different pages where finances are concerned. I suppose that is because I am more focused on retirement, since my retirement target is about 7 years earlier than his. His allowance goes into his own checking account, but his spending comes out of the household account, because he likes to 'save' his allowance for toys. Hmmm. Definitely a disconnect there. :/
I have 2 more birthdays this week. DD2 and my granddaughter share a birthday on Thursday. I budget for birthday presents, so the $ is already there. Actually, granddaughters gift is bought, and I plan to give DD2 cash. These two are the last of a string of 8 birthdays in August and September...thank goodness!
Well, time to get productive this morning. I will post an update once we know what is happening with Z. Thank you all for your thoughts, prayers, and kind words. This really is an emotional rollercoaster for all involved.
Unfortunately, I dont have an update for Z. It is two days later and there has been no word from or sign of BM and Z. We dont know if they are on the way, if plans changed, or what happened. This isnt uncommon for BM to change plans without any notice. DD2 held off on registering the kids at school in case something like this happened. I am still hopeful that they will arrive by Monday.
Today I made a big pot of chili so that I could make a batch of chili bean burritos for the freezer. I love having ready made dinners, and this is an easy one that I enjoy. The chili cost about $8 to make- and I had enough for 10 burritos and at least additional 5 meals of chili. Nice, easy, cheap! I stopped at the store and got celery, onion, carrots and a ham bone for red beans. I will make those on Monday. I also picked up a jar of pasta sauce on sale for $2 which I will use for 2-3 dinners. I got sandwich stuff, fruit, and enough meal makings for about 10 days for $84. I am going to try to stick to that budget for the next week, or longer. I have chicken breast in the freezer for lettuce wraps. and lots of stuff in the cupboards.
We have verizon phone service- they have a rewards program that I have never paid attention to, but each month we earn points for. The past couple of weeks I have been checking it out. I was able to get 2 free magazine subscriptions. I also got a couple of gift cards for 10% off at stores we shop at- an instant $10% savings! and there is a local BOGO dinner coupon where I like to dine...one dinner last 3 meals for me...so I will get 6 Thai meals for $15. We have over 400k points...so we will never run out - since most of the deals I am selecting are 1000 pts or less! I plan to keep an eye on deals for Christmas and birthdays. Much of the stuff is not anything I would buy, so I will be using points sparingly- and only on things we will use or need. (Unless it is 100% free, like the magazines- 1= Rachel Ray, and the other was Woman's Day)
I am enjoying the long weekend this weekend. No real plans. Which is nice.
DD2 found out thqt Z will be back in town tomorrow. Unfortunately, bio mom (BM) is expecting baby #4- and is heading here so that baby dad #4 doesnt go to jail for whatever crimes he has committed where they currently live. They are also fleeing a no contact order, since they are so volatile in front of the kids and with each other. Her plan, to live in a mission with all 3 kids. Z and his older sister are due to start school next week. Z, kindergarten, sister, 2nd grade.
DD2 has asked BM to let Z and sis stay at her house until more permanent arrangements are made so that they have some sense of stability to start school with. I guess we will find out this weekend. My heart breaks that Z and his siblings are in such chaos. what a broke, broke system we have for kids of druggie parents. BM asked DD2 to enroll both kids at the school nearest to her home. She couldn't even enroll her own kids in school.
I am excited to see Z...but heartbroken for his continued circumstances. Out of the 3 kids, Z is the one BM never bonded with, so she leaves him with anyone that will take him. Thankfully, if she comes and stays local, 'anyone' will be our family.
Maybe baby #4 will be the turning point for Z...I can only hope and pray.
The hub left back to Alaska today. Our weather has cooled significantly the last few days - almost feels like soup weather again- so this weekend, I plan to make a pot of soup to have on hand for the weekend.
Please keep Z and his siblings in prayer, thoughts, fingers crossed, etc. I want BM to get the help she needs- but more importantly, I want the lil guys to have the security that every child needs and deserves..
so heartbreaking, frustrating and unnecessary.