You know that dream..or that fear.. speaking in front of a group and totally freezing up, forgetting where you are at what is next and NOT finding your footing until its obvious to everyone? Yeah, that happened today and it really was as bad as I imagined it would be.
I conducted three trainings, the first went fine..but the second just got off wrong - I couldnt remember what was next, had trouble explaining my points, and about mid way through I drew a very blank screen for a brain. After a very pregnant pause, plus at least another minute or two..(people in the room actually saying, its ok, that has happened to me....)the person who is here with me jumped in and redirected the discussion- which gave me time to regroup my thoughts and finish 'ok'. The third training was much better.
I am not sure if it was lack of preparation on my part, just major stage fright, or old age setting in- but it is something I hope doesnt happen again. I typically shake stuff off- but this one was impactful on the day... bleh.
I have one more training tomorrow morning, and then I am done for this week. I sat down tonight a reworked my training notes and materials so that hopefully that doesnt happen again.
On a happier note...very nice actually, DD3 found out was rehired on the slope for summer work. She is dancing on the moon with happiness tonight. I am so proud of her. This will give her more experience and it shows they were happy with her work over the winter!! Im a truly proud mama.
Not one of the best days today..but life is good.
OT..I froze in front of the group...every trainers nightmare came true...
May 8th, 2013 at 04:27 am
May 8th, 2013 at 11:47 am 1368013657
May 8th, 2013 at 01:41 pm 1368020461
May 8th, 2013 at 01:46 pm 1368020810
May 8th, 2013 at 03:14 pm 1368026091
In high school, when I had to speak in front of class, I would turn beet red. I was determined to stop doing that as it was very embarrassing, but then my voice would shake.
I went to law school knowing I'd have to make a moot court presentation at the end of first year. I got through it, but I believe their major criticism was that i came off as "wooden" and needed to be more animated, use my hands, etc.
In one job, I was asked to conduct training of about 50 marketing reps on sales literature compliance. Because of my fear of public speaking, I managed to get my boss to agree to let me conduct the training in a series of smaller groups of about 10 people each, much more doable than going before a larger group, IMO. I got through it.
In my years long job search, I will not apply for any job that involved public speaking. Most don't anyway, as I'm a writer. It just ain't my thing, at at this point in life, I just accept that's who I am and don't try to fight against it any more.
May 8th, 2013 at 05:42 pm 1368034925
Not everybody has to be good at public speaking. Some people who are, are really not much good at anything else!
May 10th, 2013 at 03:36 am 1368156975
Even in front of my students I can still clam up though ... like last year after listening to the 6th graders give their practice presentations for the Science Fair and their teacher gave them some comments and then asked me for any additional thoughts .. I could barely speak. The teacher knew me pretty well and told the kids that they might not realize it, but Miss ... is pretty shy. The kids were shocked and didn't believe her.